Double Whammy

I am just too lazy, just too slow.

And I should not place my faith blindly in the Chinese saying that goes,”君子报仇,十年不晚.” The saying means - it is never too late for a gentleman to exact revenge.

Before I can react with regards to the socks incident, Lao Gong strike again.

On another day, in the morning hours, however this time he struck at a different place.

I was caught unaware.

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You must be wondering how I can be so deep in sleep. Am I asleep or am I dead? How can I not know that somebody wore socks on me?

I have to concede I am a really deep sleeper.

Ok, I shall recount two incidents to prove my guilt.

Incident 1

About 10 years ago, I was staying over at my aunt’s place. It was very late into the night. My cousin, Bee Ger was running a high fever, and my aunt was very worried. My aunt decided to bring Bee Ger to the doctor there & then.

She tried to call her hubby to bring them to the doctor but apparently he continued sleeping. So she came to the room I was in and wanted me to accompany them. However after numerous attempts to wake me, I did not budge a single bit.

With all the commotion going on, it was only much later that I finally awoke as I heard sound coming from the entrance of her house. Only then did I realise all the actions I had missed. My aunt and her hubby were at their doorway, preparing to make their way to the doctor with the whole family, including their maid. Everybody was awake except me.

My only consolation is that even earthquakes can’t bring me down next time. If I happen to be asleep then, of course.

Incident 2

Actually this happens on a daily basis.
Lao Gong and I have a sleeping arrangement.

Before we enter slumber land, Lao Gong must ensure he sleeps on the side of the bed besides the dressing table - where the alarm clocks are.

It seems senseless that he insists that he must sleep on the left as our alarm clocks are on the left. He has valid reasons.

On several occasions, I slept on the left. And guess what! In the morning when the alarm sounds, Lao Gong has to climb over me from the right and reaches for the alarm clocks to silence them off. I don’t even hear them ringing. Poor Lao Gong, it is indeed a drag to wake up in such circumstances.
.
But frankly speaking, to me, it does not matter where I sleep as he is the one who turns the alarm off, not me. I am not awaken, not affected.Haha!

Sometimes I will still insist to sleep on the left despite knowing his grounds, simply because I liked it. Lao Gong reacted by shifting the alarm clocks before turning in. He will place them right beside his pillow and reminded me frankly that this arrangement is more effortless for him. He did not forget to add that if he is to wait for me to turn off the alarm, by that time, all our neighbours would have been disturbed.
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The above incidents are conclusive about this hard fact that I am through and through a deep sleeper.

So what did Lao Gong do this time round?

I woke up that morning to find a surprise in my hand.



Chey! What a scare! It is my favorite Care-bear! Count myself lucky that it is not ice-cream.

Hmm, I must hatch a much bigger plot to address all my grievances all these while.

The Animal Quiz

PY took the country quiz, while I am more interested in the animal quiz.

So I am a dove, it concludes.

What else can I possibly be?
I can’t swim.

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You're a Dove!

A fan of olives and the United Nations, you'd love to teach the
world to sing in perfect harmony. You like stretching your legs at major events,
and have done your best to ward off floods when the waters have risen. All this
running around leaves you exhausted, and it often seems you can never quite get
the peace you so dearly crave. You really like to take showers.

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Rock my socks!

Do you have a habit of wearing socks to bed?

I don’t. And I don’t think anyone will. Ok, when he was still around, my grandpa wore socks at times as he felt cold at night. He’s the only person I know so far.
One morning, I woke to find socks on my feet. Surprised? Puzzled?

I find it more amusing than anything.

Who could have done this? Not me definitely. I don’t sleepwalk, and which sleepwalker will go forth and wear socks for oneself in the middle of the night? Crazy.

I looked around, Lao Gong is musing at the sight of me in my socks. He burst out laughing loudly.

Apparently, he is lurking around the bedroom, waiting for me to open my eyes and made the discovery.

I am amused and angry with him at the same time. What a silly joke! Trust him to think of this. And he is delaying his departure to work just to have a good laugh.

Ok, he wins.

Dear Lao Gong, you rock my world, you rock my socks!

But just you wait!

认同 (Acknowledgement)

Received the following feedback from oceanskies79 regarding the car plate article.

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oceanskies79 said...

‘Yes, your Lao gong was right, it looks nicer in white wordings. The imprint of your names on the bottom border looks cool!’

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I forwarded the above message to Lao Gong.

Lao Gong shot back, ‘Who is it? Good to know that i have her 认同 (ie. acknowledgement).’

I can sense that Lao Gong feel very smug about himself.

I replied to him, ‘PY.’

It is not enough to feel good, he need to feel on top of the world, he replied, ‘She’s the arty farty right? If she says nice, it must be.’

Lao Gong is recognizing my friend, PY for being very much into the arts or is he self-actualizing himself?

I beg to choose the latter.



Men & their ego.

Call Me Stupid

He would not give up.

One evening, Lao Gong smsed me, “Everybody is looking for Xiaofen.”

I called him almost instanteously. “Where are you?”

"Driving. On the way home to my FAT wifey!”

"Fat wifey” is one of the many horrible names he has come up with, for me. I should adore him for his creativity and wits, but not at my expense, right? To him, I am otherwise known as, “Turnip, 海豚(i.e. dolphin), witty whiffy wifey, 巨人婆(i.e. giant wife), 大米(i.e. big grain)…” And the list is inexhaustive.

To get back on track, “Anyway, just who is looking for me? Everybody? I’m not that famous. I don’t believe you.”

"Everybody who peeped into our car and find me driving alone. Everybody is trying to catch a glimpse of you.”

Okay, he won again. He is obviously still rattling about our car plate. Why have I let my guard down again?

Label him persistent.



Better still, call me stupid.

Where is Xiaofen?

Lao Gong came home one day and recounted to me excitedly, “When I was driving home, a lot of drivers peeped into our car and looked disappointed.”

“Huh? Why?” I enquired unbelievably. How can that be? What have he done?
He replied, “Because everyone looked into our car and they can’t find you. I know inside their minds they are asking themselves this question, ‘Where is Xiaofen?’ That’s why!”

Oops! He trapped me yet again. I can’t help but smiled back.

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The above episode takes place because Lao Gong has just changed our car license plate. For what?

For aesthetic reason of course, you should know it by now.

Our original car license plate is black in colour with silver border and silver lettering.

While driving on the road one day, he realized that black license plate looks its best with white lettering, not silver, not the standard one we are given. And it must not have border too. What is the diff, I think! It is just a license plate. He simply refused to settle with the standard and ordinary one.

Suddenly, we found ourselves spending seventy bucks ordering an almost identical car plate. (ie. Identical to me, but not to him of course, a small difference makes all the difference to him.) I’m not this particular and to be curt, I’m not so fussy.

However I really have to love him for this. Lao Gong personalized it further by requesting the shop to help us imprint our names at the bottom border of our car plate, so instead of just seeing the car license plate number, others would also get the pleasure of knowing us - by putting the faces in the car to the names shown on the plate. First there is the car decal episode, and now there is this declaration which is pretty AA (attract attention) in nature. Only he is capable of all this.



Get the picture? (pun intended.)

Dedicated to my beloved cousins - Bee-Ger & Dengue Boy

Both of you see me & g.g.g. at least once every week, do you really miss me so much?

And last week, Dengue Boy - I visited you and accompanied you almost daily in hospital when you are suffering rashes, fever... And now I can see that you have indeed recovered fully from dengue, you ungrateful fellow trying to reprimand me on MY blog. Do you think I have 48 hours a day huh?

Why are both of you so KPO about g.g.g. & my stuff? You are simply too KPO for your age. Better go do the work I have assigned you. I never chase the assignments from you and you dare to chase me. The more you chase, the more I don't publish.

Haha!